Escape From the Scooby Doo Mansion

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Friday, November 14, 2008

Fashion Cage Match - PLAYOFF ROUND: People from New Jersey vs. People at a Sci-Fi Convention

Gentlemen, for your own sakes I hope you remain law-abiding at all times -because you are officially too damned pretty for prison.

But, if you should end up incarcerated, this guy will be there to meet you.

Guys, did you take a look in the mirror before you headed out for the evening?

I'm not sure how this is happening, but it's happening.

Beauty may only be skin-deep, but sometimes plastic surgery and steroid abuse go all the way through.

I think these guys are about to run in the Sci-fi Marathon. More power to 'em. I wonder if they call it "the Kessel run"?

Oompa loompa oopiddy doo.

Aye yai yai!

I still would like a further explanation about the "ease the seat back" spoken word soliloquy in Van Halen's "Panama." Creepy Jersey-edition David Lee Roth, would you care to explain?

I was wondering when Wonder Woman and Dr. Strange were going to finally get together. Oh wait, they live in two complete different comic book universes. He's from Marvel, she's from DC. I'm afraid that this photo is evidence of a very serious rift in the space-time continuum.

They start 'em young in Jersey.

Hello Vader.

Kid, unless your name is L'il Mama, I suggest you rethink the lip gloss strategy. Love the penciled-on beard though. Really butches it up for ya.

Your mom's costume remains awesome.

It's an old New Jersey tradition to celebrate Christmas by spray-painting your face orange.

Jedi Knights, on the other hand, honor baby Jesus with a delicious and wholesome meal from Taco Bell.

Speedo? Actually, spee-don't.
Please.


Sir, I'm afraid we're going to have cite you for wearing spandex without a license.
P.S. love the sandals. They say "action!"

This is what the Incredible Hulk would look like if he was from Jersey.

Fortunately, Tron Guy is here to protect us if the Jersey Hulk gets... angry. You wouldn't like him when he's angry.

Seriously, what is up with New Jersey guys and the lips?


Gentlemen, whatever your question may be (and I do mean whatever), the answer is a resounding "yes!"

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3 Comments:

At November 15, 2008 12:29 PM, Anonymous tc said...

First, I will comment only on the Jersey photos. We expect a level of ridiculousness from Sci Fi conventions. The Jersey folks in these pictures actually BELIEVE in what they look like.

I just don't know where to begin... spray tans, cocked heads, as you say "the lips"...

Holy crap, the per capita ratio of Dep gel in Jersey must be upwards of 2 gallons per civilian. Factor in spray tans and body oils and you have an environmental hazard the EPA could only shut its eyes to lest they drain the coffers of the US Treasury to deal with a spill of that magnitude.

To address something from the dork convention - many of those codpieces could use a tighter hammock. YEESH!

I LOVE feeling superior to others. Happy Saturday.

 
At November 18, 2008 2:43 PM, Blogger Lucas said...

Pirate,
I shant be sleeping tonight and probably not for many nights after. Burned retnas, emotionally scarring, fear of being harpooned by spikey hair. I may be permanently damaged. I wonder if anyone knows a lawyer I could contact?

 
At November 24, 2008 1:53 PM, Blogger Rev. Tomkin Coleman said...

I thought that some of the photos were re-touched with Photoshop, but nope...wow, those are really real. Wow.

 

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